Week Thirteen

13 weeks down on Friday the 13th.

After three days of feeling just down right lethargic and miserable, I do not think I am going to run the half-marathon tomorrow. My tailbone, believe it or not, hurts a lot when its cold outside. Temperatures should reach the high 40s with showers all morning.

I do not feel like pushing it especially since I start work on Monday.

I hate, hate, hate that I am not going to run. I also hate sitting around doing nothing, but even standing for awhile makes me tired.



This week, after 13 weeks, I am starting to "forget" what life with him is like. When he left the walls echoed his name and our memories together filled the air in the house. I hate saying this, but our house now feels like my house. I am falling into a steady routine of life without him.

Not to mention, my current reading selection: The Day After He Left for Iraq by Melissa Seligman

I never thought I would pick this book up and read it, however, with subbing, reading became an addiction. I read two other books (Celebutants by Amanda Goldberg & To Have And To Hold by Jane Green) in less than 3 weeks.

Some chapters I want to shake her and tell her to get it together and other times I think to myself, you poor, amazing Army Wife, trying to survive deployment with 2 young kids and living at Drum with all that snow. Either way, this book really makes me think...

I am glad I am reading it. It shows everyone handles deployments differently. The author writes honestly. However, I think she concentrates more on "poor me" instead of "thriving".

Here I handle deployment with denial and numbness. And to be honest, in 13 weeks, only 2 days stick out in my mind where I thought to myself "I do not want to do this". Seligman, on the other hand, does not deny her feelings, her loneliness, her pain, or her anger at her husband. Her emotions and energy pours over into developing her 2-year old daughter's attitude toward her daddy being at "work".

Oh so many thoughts on this book. I hope to finish it in the next few days.


Besides reading, I did manage to cook something new for our pot luck this week. I love how I force myself to make new things every month. This week our theme was "Soup and Sandwiches" and I volunteered to make the sandwiches.

Instead of the traditional sub sandwiches, I found a recipe for Awesome Grilled Cheese Sandwiches. I finally used my panini press and the sandwiches consisted of mozzarella, roasted turkey, red peppers, and Texas Toast slices.



Being sick does has its perks. I managed to have a two hour conversation with him over Skype, our longest conversations since he left. Sometimes I forget how sweet he is or how lucky I am to be falling in love with my best friend. My best friend who always makes me smile.

While talking about my new job.

Him: I just don't think you understand how good you are
Me: Ha, what do you mean?
Him: You have the body of a porn star, the attitude of a Midwest girl, the drive of a CEO, and more passion than anyone I know and you don't even know it.

I may not get flowers or sweet emails all of the time, but that's ok...